Bulk buying at BJs

I've always heard it's a good idea and I've even tried it once or twice with mediocre success, but lately I've been thinking how great it would be to do one big shop per month.

'Cause frankly, I'm exhausted!

Our schedule hasn't eased up much despite trying to combine errands and designate days. Our weeks normally involve some activity out of the house every day except Thursdays and sometimes Saturdays, which I guess is better than something every day. Most days I also wind up stopping in at the market for just a few things, by which phrase I usually am doomed to spend much more than I intend for less food than I actually need.

So we joined BJ's Tuesday. We don't have one in our town, but there's one 20 miles away in the town where Curly Sue takes dance. I figured if I was going to be there once a week for at least two hours anyway, I could do some shopping while she's in class. Milk's cheap and so is gas with a membership card.

We made a special trip there tonight, trying to beat the Labor Day crowds and lay in our first monthly supplies. We came in about $30 under our budget for the trip, and we still have a small weekly amount budgeted for fresh produce, eggs and anything else we need so I can stop back by on my weekly trip if I need to. I also intend to top off my gas tank while I'm there.

In addition to bulk amounts of staple items, we also picked up Rice Krispies Treats, cheese puff balls, animal crackers, peanut butter crackers, frozen pizzas and chewing gum. It's going to be tricky, seeing vats of treats sitting around and disciplining ourselves to ration them so they last an entire month. (I know my personal limits, so we left the 30-pack of candy bars on the shelf.)

Still, I'm confident this will be a successful experiment so I'm keeping myself accountable to myself by posting here. Hopefully in a month I'll be able to report how few trips I actually made to a regular market and how we stayed within a reasonable grocery budget as a result.

Do my children make me a better woman?

I think so! I love this quote:

"Perhaps a better woman after all,
With chubby children hanging on my neck
To keep me low and wise."
-- Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Lessons from Ferrero Rocher

Yesterday Moe used the restroom at the allergist, and when I automatically asked him if he'd washed his hands, he lied to me.

Three times.

I knew, because he was surreptitiously slipping his hands into his pockets while I was asking. He 'fessed up but knew he was in a world of trouble. Fortunately, we weren't at home, so I couldn't do my usual yell-before-I-think routine. (Which doesn't do any good, anyway.)

Lying is one of a very few remaining spankable offenses in our house, so he already was aware of what awaited him when he got home. Asking for guidance from the Holy Spirit -- knowing I was tired from a long drive and discouraged that the outing we'd eagerly anticipated was a bust because of the rain -- I stopped by the market, looking for something to make the "don't lie" lesson stick.

Moe went in with me and, mystified, carried out a box of a dozen shiny gold-wrapped Ferrero Rocher candies. At home, I sent the bigs downstairs and settled Moe and the candies on my bed. We got the ugliness out of the way and started talking, me with a running "Show me what to do!" prayer going the whole time.

"Aren't these lovely candies, and don't you want one? I know I do! Let's each eat just one."

As we enjoyed them -- him eyeing me rather suspiciously -- I asked him what would happen if we ate the whole box.

"We'd be very sick," Moe said.

Right, I told him. So if I said it's okay to eat one but not the whole box, isn't that to protect him from being sick? That's like lying -- it's not okay to lie because it can make your soul and mind sick.

I thought I saw a glimmer of understanding, but I wasn't sure.

So I went on (praying, praying), pointing at one of the remaining candies.

"See how shiny and perfect that wrapped candy looks?" I asked. "But what if I knew there was a worm inside it? Would I leave it alone so he could call his friends to get into the rest of the candies, or would I take out that one candy and throw it in the garbage to protect the other candies?"

Lying is like the worm in the candy, I told him. If we don't get rid of lying, it will infect the rest of your life. Eventually you might think it's okay to steal (pointing at another candy) or hurt people (another candy) or ... (other candies).

This time, I was sure. Tears streamed down his sweet little face as he promised me he would not lie again. I told him to choose another candy, and to talk to God alone and ask for help keeping his word while he enjoyed the candy. Then I left the room with a peaceful spirit and a quiet mind.

I wrote about this one because it's drastically different from most of the "lessons" my children learn. I am extremely hard on them -- Geddy will tell you, we both are -- and we have very high expectations. I yell, I am angry and frustrated often, but I am a work in progress and God clearly is not finished with me yet.

But, remembering I hadn't laid my child open like I am prone to do in situations like that one, I worried whether I had made my point well enough. Until goodnight blessings, when I heard a sweet little voice saying:

"Lord, thank you so much for a mom who loves me enough to teach me lessons about not lying."

And then I was sure. Tears were streaming down my own face as I promised I would not doubt the Holy Spirit's prompting again.

(I wanted to add that I have been jolted out of my parenting rut by a book called Children: The Challenge. I just finished a chapter on encouragement that spoke to me like nothing I've read before. Usually I shy away from parenting books but this one is worth recommending. A word of caution: it is not a Christian parenting book but written by a psychologist, and it was first published in 1964 so may seem a bit dated.)

Lordy, lordy

I hit my 40s yesterday!

Hey, I don't mind admitting it...I figure I've earned every year of it. It's sort of a relief, really. Some of us spend the last half of our 30s dreading turning 40, so when the big day rolls around, you feel like you've finally made it.

We did some schoolwork, worked on some glaring character issues and took a nap yesterday. Red Lobster was dinner and Coldstone Creamery dessert, and in between we spent some time at Barnes and Noble. We even had time to run through BJs, comparing prices to see if a membership would be worth the fee.

Tomorrow we are heading to my parents' house for a traditional spaghetti dinner and Sunday after church we will go to my cousin's house to welcome home her newly graduated Marine son.

See? Life goes on. Here's to the 40s!

I've made a lot of boneheaded decisions in my life...

...but enrolling the children in Georgia Virtual Academy is not one of them.

We started school Wednesday and it was brilliant. Not to say perfect, because communication still is an issue and we don't have history materials yet. In terms of how it works inside our home, though, it's a great fit.

My anti-math seventh-grader now says pre-algebra is his favorite subject. All three children are learning to work within a deadline and scheduling is helping us all. Even with a nasty cold working its way through the family, we nailed the school thing.

Hooray!

The gift of service

The episode of "Friends" where Phoebe is trying to do something nice without getting anything in return is hilarious, but there's definitely some truth in the idea that do-gooders enjoy do-gooding because it makes us feel good.

I offered to help a scooter-bound lady in the grocery store yesterday but she wasn't having any part of it. Not content with a no, thank you, she yelled that she didn't need my help and I felt humiliated in front of everyone in the produce section and worse, my three children.

I won't hesitate to offer next time I see what I think is a need, though I might cower a little. But I sure as shot will be thinking a whole lot more about the person to whom I'm offering assistance than about myself.

And that's not a bad thing.

Happy first day of school!

We officially started GVA today. As I anticipated, it took us a looooonnnnggg time to finish our lessons, but I was very encouraged by the quality of the work my children turned out. Larry had a rocky start with pre-algebra today, but eventually we both got the hang of it and he really seemed much more engaged with his math work than is typical.

Dish Network got re-installed today so the house -- already a mess -- got turned upside down, and the dogs dragged the trash all over the dining room. We finished school only about a half-hour before we had to leave for church. Still, it was a great feeling to file attendance and know the first day is behind us.

We get to try our hand at science tomorrow, and the children are anxious to get started with that subject. Hopefully, we'll hone our schedule and each day will get a bit easier until we have it down. I'm tired but pleased and am looking forward to what's next.

So shines a good deed in a weary world

Today, Curly Sue and I drove 1.5 hours to the nearest Volvo dealer. Our little red wagon has been a bit ill lately -- specifically, its brakes -- and we wanted to have them checked. A couple of weeks ago, Geddy took off a Friday and we had scheduled maintenance performed, during which the mechanics could find nothing amiss. Still, the brakes have been grinding and not feeling quite right, so back we went.

Two seatbelts had to be replaced under warranty, and the service manager told me he'd have the brakes checked again. Volvo is meticulous about safety and this dealership is excellent about customer service, so we settled in with a book and snacks for a long wait.

Anticipating a bill of about $500, I transferred some cash from savings to checking this morning, glad I had the foresight when the service manager told us the brakes were going to need replacing. After a not-as-long-as-we-thought wait, I was presented with a bill of $0.00.

"Wait," I said. "I know I don't owe anything for the warranty work, but I need to pay for the brakes."

The manager grinned at me, dismissed me with a wave, and said, "Nope. See you later."

I don't know how or why he did it. Maybe it was a warranty thing, or maybe it was that they hadn't fixed the problem last time even though we expressed concerns. Maybe he's a really great guy who works at a really phenomenal car dealership (does one exist?!). Could be a combination.

Days like today, though, the handbasket to hell slows down a little.

Well-schooled

Legally, our family is no longer homeschooling because the children are enrolled in Georgia Virtual Academy this year, which makes them public school students working at home. As I've said, we have committed to one year and will make future decisions based on this year's experience.

So far, I am very pleased with the materials provided by GVA, even if the communication leaves a bit to be desired. However, I am willing to squelch my misgivings because the more I see, the more I am convinced Geddy was correct in his observation that this program will be greatly beneficial to our family.

I am a great supporter of homeschooling but a bigger supporter of support; that is, encouraging all parents to make the best educational choices for their children according to their family's abilities and convictions.

Boy howdy, if I thought I took it on the chin from public school supporters in the six years we independently homeschooled, I didn't know what I was in for from the homeschooling community when I joined a virtual school!

I don't need anyone to point out my shortcomings. As Bridget Jones would say, I already feel like an idiot most of the time. But I'm doing just what I would encourage other folks to do, and that's the best I can for my children according to my family's abilities and convictions.

Go see Warren Barfield!

Geddy, Larry, Curly Sue and I just got back from another Warren Barfield concert, and it happened to be Curly Sue's first-ever concert. She has had a sinus infection and started feeling ill a few songs from the end, but until then she really seemed to enjoy it. She likes his music almost as much as Geddy and I do, and Larry's game for pretty much any live music as long as he can share it with his friends Austin and Patrick.

We sat on the front row, which was pretty great -- it felt like he was performing just for us. As always, he was phenomenal. We were able to talk to him a bit after the show. He was friendly and pleasant though he had to be extremely tired, and he called Curly Sue beautiful. (She is, but it's always good to hear an outsider's opinion when it agrees with my own.) I took a photo of him with Larry but Curly Sue wasn't feeling up to it. Too bad, 'cause he's one of her heroes.

Anyway, once again I will highly recommend your catching one of his shows when you get a chance. He is a lot of fun!

Introspection

I started Boundaries today and saw myself in Sherrie. Can't wait to find out how to fix myself.