Ruled by fear

The concept of rule by fear is nothing new, even in the literature and history my children currently are studying.

Squirt and I are reading The Epic of Gilgamesh, in which the people of Uruk complain to the gods because "none could withstand his arms." Gilgamesh did whatever he wanted because he knew no one could defeat him.

European explorers and settlers -- well, we all know how they treated Native Americans. Vikings were such war-mongerers that their entire concept of the afterlife hinged on dying in battle. In virtually every one of Andrew Lang's Blue Fairy Book tales, a menacing person or creature keeps someone cowering in fear.

As for the Bible, tyrants abound in the Old Testament and in the New Testament we are often warned to be on our guard against the devil because "he prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour." (1 Peter 5:8, NIV)

Yet I find myself, even armed with this knowledge and a deep and abiding faith in God, worrying. Squirt and I will be on our way to the doctor in an hour to have his head checked out. He has a lump that has been there since at least summer, although I only became aware of it yesterday. It looks and feels like a harmless type of calcium deposit. My mom has had them. So has my brother. I say I'm not worried, and then...I do.

What if? I wonder. Cancer is the scourge of Geddy's family. His grandmother, his mom, his dad, his uncle. At around midnight last night, cancer took a fine man just a few years older than we are, a much-loved husband and father. Monday, a good friend will have what we all pray is her last breast cancer-related surgery. Another friend is recovering from reconstructive surgery after a radical double mastectomy. Our 10-year-old neighbor nearly died last fall from the toxic effects of chemotherapy he had as a toddler, when he was diagnosed with a rare form of bladder cancer. What if?

I don't know, but God does. And that's the key: every tyrant has his challenger and every oppressed people its champion. Enkidu was Gilgamesh's; Jesus is ours. I can continue to be ruled by fear as I always have been, or I can choose to follow my champion. I want to be strong enough to let go of my worry and live the life of abundant joy I've been promised, even when the threat is toward my children instead of myself.